One man gave divorce to his wife in 2011 in state of anger during the
fight three times and ruju after two days. Then in 2013 Husband and
wife used to have arguments every now and then due to some outstanding
issues that husband didn't wanted his wife to do. One day During the
argument husband was in extreme anger and said lots of things to his
wife including divorce three times which he didn't realise during the
argument. Wife then walked out of shop and return couple of minutes
later and wrote on a piece of paper "Divorce Happened" and give it to
husband and left. Husband read this and then followed her to house and
apologised and ruju within one hour. In January 2014, while the wife
was pregnant, husband was unhappy to travel with her family to
overseas for 2 months. This argument stayed unresolved for many months
and at the end husband compromised and let the wife and three year old
daughter go overseas. Later he decided to join them overseas after few
days. After arriving overseas husband contact his wife. She wanted him
to come to their place and get them. Both end up having argument again
and this time mother in law participated as well. After having extreme
argument with mother in law on the phone for few minutes, husband and
wife then continued arguing via text messages.. Husband was demanding
to meet his daughter and that he will bring his daughter with him but
not wife since she left without him and didn't listen to him. During
this argument, he wrote to his wife "Consider Yourself Divorced. You
are not capable of being anyones wife" These words were un thoughtful
and unintentional. Husband still don't realise the moment when he
wrote these words. Can you please answer in the light of Ahl-e-Hadith
Maslak. Jazakallah Khair
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify
that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that
Muhammadis His slave and Messenger.
Marriage is one of the great rites of Islam, and it is one of the
Signs of Allaah. Allaah described marriage in the Quran as a solemn
covenant; Allaah says )what means(: }And of His signs is that He
created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in
them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that
are signs for a people who give thought.{ ]Quran 30:21[ Allaah also
says )what means(: }And how could you take it while you have gone in
unto each other and they have taken from you a solemn covenant?{
]Quran 4:21[
Since marriage is of this status, it should not be undermined by
uttering words of divorce for trivial reasons, especially since the
wise Sharee'ah did not make divorce the first solution for a troubled
marriage. In addition to this, it should be noted that both spouses
are ordered to treat each other kindly and each one should respect the
rights and status of the other: Allaah says )what means(: }And due to
them ]i.e. the wives[ is similar to what is expected of them,
according to what is reasonable. But the men ]i.e. husbands[ have a
degree over them ]in responsibility and authority[. And Allaah is
Exalted in Might and Wise.{ ]Quran 2:228[
On the other hand, anger does not prevent divorce from taking place
unless the husband is not conscious of what he says as we explained in
Fatwa 121374.
It is based on these details ]in the above referred Fatwa[ that the
ruling on divorce is issued, i.e. whether or not it had taken place
when you uttered it while in a state of anger; as you are more aware
of your own situation.
Three divorces pronounced in one session take place as three divorces
according to the view of the majority of scholars and this is the view
we adopt here in Islamweb. However,Shaykh Ibn Taymiyyahand his
studentIbn Al-Qayyimconsider that three divorces in one session take
place as one divorce. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa
questions 200411and 89861.
We do not know on what basis you took your wife back the first time
after having uttered divorce three times. However, if you consider it
to be the most evident scholarly opinion because you are a student of
knowledge, or because you followed the opinion of a scholar whose
knowledge you trust and he issued you a Fatwa that three divorces in
one session take place as one divorce, then in this case, you are not
sinful.
Please note that the expression that your wife wrote: "Divorce
happened" does not result in anything as divorce is in the hands of
the husband. Also, the words of the husband to his wife: "Consider
yourself divorced" is a metaphor of divorce and it does not result in
divorce except with intention. In addition to this, a divorce in
writing is also a metaphor of divorce as clarified in Fatwa questions
87034and 89894.
As for divorcing a pregnant wife, it is not against the Sunnah, so the
fact that the wife is pregnant does not prevent divorce from taking
place.
Finally, since the matters which we have mentioned require finding out
from you your intention when uttering divorce expressions and your
state of anger, then in our view, it is better to consult an Islamic
Center in your country or verbally ask a trustworthy scholar there.
Allaah Knows best.
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Regards,
NAJIMUDEEN M/
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